Thursday, August 28, 2008

Meanwhile, Back at the Gym

Because of my work schedule, I haven’t been able to make it back for a second date with IRON BODIES. Yesterday, I finally got off work early enough make it to the class. The problem was I was there an hour early. So I decided rather than kill time until class started, I would just do my normal cardio routine instead of IRON BODIES but I promised myself I would kick it up a notch or two. I started with thirteen minutes on the Stairmaster at level 6. I usually do 12 minutes at level 5. I know, right? I’m a wild woman! The stairs kill me. I sweat like a pig while climbing and I’m pretty sure that the mental age of my knees is 92. Then it was off to the stationery bicycle where I put in 25 minutes at level 5 doing the hill climbing simulation. I found this to be more challenging and a really good workout. All the while I am being motivated by the ever-inspiring MAMMA MIA soundtrack on my iPod. Once the bike was sufficiently conquered I moved on to the elliptical where I really got into gear. I’m in the ZONE. I am MOVING! My iPod is blaring “Give me, give me, give me a man after midnight”. OK, so MAMMA MIA is probably not the obvious choice for workout music but I find it to be very energizing and “surprisingly upbeat”. (movie?..... anyone?....)

So, I’m working, I’m pedaling, my arms are going. Suddenly I realize there is a thumping in my ears that doesn’t seem to be coming from my headphones. I can’t decide if this is my heart throbbing in my ears and I'm about to have a stroke or if I’m rocking the elliptical and about to tip. As I said, I’m in the ZONE so it was no time to stop and investigate. I kept on. The feet are pumping, the sweat is flying. I’m like a crazed woman. I eventually realize people are starting to take notice. A crowd starts to gather. People are whispering. Then chanting… “Go Smart Mouth, Go Smart Mouth”.

Alright, maybe it didn’t go quite like that. There definitely were people taking notice though. The guy on the machine next to me was giving me the eye. I think this is because I was breathing so hard it was distracting. I did see a couple staring at me and whispering. I imagine the conversation went like this:

“Do you think she is alright?”

“I don’t know.”

“Maybe we should call someone.”

“She looks like she is about to explode.”

“Look how red her face is.”

“Let’s get out of here.”

After the cool-down, I exited the gym victoriously. No gold medal but feeling like a winner. I just hope that later today and/or tomorrow, I will still be able to tie my shoes.

4 comments:

smiles4u said...

I so need to get back to working out and was suppose to start this week but here it is thursday and nope have done nothing...ugh! Your post inspires me to get off my ass and start doing something.

Thank you for the great laugh to start out my day with and for the inspiration!

Midlife Slices said...

LOL But you can't leave me hanging. (oh gawd, that was a poor choice of words at my age.) What was the loud thumping? Did you make it to your Hard Bodies class? Inquiring minds need to know these details. :)

Bear Naked said...

You are my inspiration.

Bear((( )))

Smart Mouth Broad said...

Smiles4u and Bear Naked - I'm honored that you would think of ME as an inspiration. I can't say that I enjoy working out but I love the feeling when it's over.

Midlife Slices - You know, I really don't know what it was but I didn't have a stroke and I didn't tip over....? I didn't go to IRON BODIES
because I will give no more than 90 minutes to my exercise routine. If I can't get fit with that, I will just be a fat ole broad. Thanks for pointing out I didn't make that clear, I edited the post.

Thanks to all for stopping by.