Wednesday, May 12, 2010

EVEN WHEN YOU FALL FLAT ON YOUR FACE

……You progress at least five feet.  Six for some people.


no quitting Failure.  Utter and complete failure.  This is what I’ve experienced.  *sigh*

I created this blog almost two years ago upon realizing that I am up midlife creek without a xanax.  Suddenly, I am no longer the kid in the room but instead am often referred to as the old lady.  (Seems some people have forgotten their Southern manners.)  Amid accusations from my physician of pre-menopause, pre-diabetes, pre-hypertension and pre-meditated murder, it was also suggested that losing a few pounds would definitely be in my best interest.  Well, I never!……..yeah, right.  Like that was a news flash.  Just because I weigh more than I did at nine months pregnant…….Crap!  Did I just say that out loud?  Let’s just forget that I mentioned that little tidbit, OK?

Anyway, the point is that we are two years down the road and where am I?  Right here mired in the same muck, that’s where. 

Ever the cock-eyed optimist, I’m not giving up.  Quit is not in my vocabulary but I am stuck. 

Things were going well until Thanksgiving.  Yes, I know that was months ago.  And I’ve used the past few months to completely undo any progress I’ve made. 
Let’s review:
  • I was exercising regularly.
  • I was eating healthy.
  • I was taking the handfuls of supplements that my physician recommended.
  • I turned my bloodwork around and in fact became the poster child for fish oil.
Then the holidays came and went and with them went my will power.  Life became more stressful and I caved.  There has been some un-be-loggable happenings going on at work. And we all know that the economy has struck fear in the hearts of every home in America, mine being no exception.  And so a reward/consolation system was established.
  • Have a bad day at work = have a cookie
  • Have a great day at work?  Celebrate = have a cookie
  • Car trouble = cookie
  • broken nail = definitely cookie time!
  • Daughter #1 gets great job = cookies all around
  • Daughter #2 gets into the major of her dreams = you got it….cookies….with sprinkles!
And so you see the problem.

I want to move forward in a positive way.  I want to lose weight, eat right, exercise and become the best SMB I can be…….and all that crap I said in my very first blog post here two years ago but where to start?
Low fat?  Low Carb?   Raw?  Points?  Zones?  Whole grains?  Botox?  Kick box?  (See how I rhymed there?  Brian will be so proud.)  Or just ditch it all and have plastic surgery.  A body replacement.  They can do that now, right? 

What to do?  I’m at a loss.  I’m turning to you, my trusted friends.  Where to begin…again?

I’m waiting………….

22 comments:

Perfectly Unperfect said...

If I had the answer...I would not be stuck in the same situation that you are in....again and again.

Maybe we could form some time of support group for those bloggers that need to shed a few or a hundred pounds.

I am more of the latter.

I too am confused as to where to begin at {again}....I hope someone has the answers we all need!

I think a good balance and good combination of some of those that you mentioned just might work.

Good luck to you!!

Michaela said...

My dear, I know how you feel!
About 2 years ago my Doc implied I might wanna lose some weight. I was insulted!!! After about a year (and more lbs) I had to admit he was right. For the 1st time in my whole life, I was overweight :-O My personal plan was to try and lose it myself, and then if I got stuck, go to Weight watchers for help. I lost 10lb on my own, then I went to WW and lost a further 25lb. Turns out, there was a lot I didn't know about what's IN certain foods. Babe, I totally sympathize with your hiarious eating excuses. My own are a crack-up, u can laugh at me on my blog - Oxygen Masks Will Drop (topic: Flab Fighters). Good luck with Project Foxy, and may the Force be with you!

Snappy Di said...

I'm going to try low carb now that the Italian Creme cake that I bought over the week-end is gone. Well.... I couldn't just throw it out so had to finish it first.

Di

idgtm said...

ugghh....know this feeling very well. Had to kick start myself on to WW and plugged in the treadmill, which we all know was invented by a man.

Anyway, I managed to lose a few pounds. Each day is hell and I know from experience that starting is the hardest thing to do.

Also keeping a food journal helps.

Keeps up posted.

Brian Miller said...

i am proud of your rhyming...smiles.

a good a time as any to hit the restart button...

Fragrant Liar said...

I'm pretty sure we should discuss this over cookies.

I have milk.

Erin P said...

Oh, I can also chime in that I know exactly how you feel...my excuses for gaining the weight are pretty lame too...and I seem to have started different things so many times...we have spurts of eating very well, and I actually ran 28 miles in April...started counting points again about 3 times in 4 months.....and then everything else catches up and I'm back to eating out, not exercising and drinking more than I should.

If you come up with how to do it, other than just starting over again, PLEASE please please let me know!! Maybe knowing that so many of the rest of us are doing exactly the same will help. Support-group like.

Deb said...

We celebrate with cookies too. I have no advice for you. Only compassion. It's a difficult thing. Hang in there and I'll be here cheering for you!

Arkansas Patti said...

Guess there is no one answer for we are all different and have different food vices and needs. Not in to sweets here but show me animal fat and salty--yowsah.
Bought a new piece of exercise equipment yesterday, a walk behind lawnmower and am retiring the rider. Gives the same if not better benefits of a treadmill and you actually get something done.
Good luck, we all need it.

Expat From Hell said...

Obviously you are not alone, friend. But just as obviously it isn't about cookies. It's an inward thing - I am finding that cleaning out my "inner closets" has been helpful. Redefining what faith is, what the meaning of life is, my politics, my friendships (hell, even my blog tactics), all - for better or worse - might need to be tossed out of the window. How does that feel? EFH

tulpen said...

Feeling the same things over here. Time for some changes. Time to treat my body with a little more respect.

I don't have any anwers for you though. I'm not sure where to start myself.

good luck SMB.

(cristin)

blueviolet said...

I've been there many, many times and no matter how hard I try, I can't force it. I'm not wired that way. All the sudden my brain will click into gear and I'm in the mode. It's the craziest thing.

Actually, a lot of the time, it stems from a stressful event, in this case filing for divorce. Boom! My weight fell off after that.

only a movie said...

Right there with you, my friend. I lost over 20lbs on WW 2 years ago. Half of the weight is back due to Winter. (I know, it's almost May).

Recently got serious due to allergic hell and have already lost 4 lbs. Plus hiking season is coming up and I'd like to haul less ass up the hill.

I'm all for the online support. :-) I love Jan's recipe today.

Jan said...

Replace "cookies" with "red wine" and you'll have my situation.

I'm doin' the whole low carb thing, myself (so is 24). All of my recipes are low carb lately. Four pounds in two weeks...meh, it could be better, but I'll take what I can get. I'm not going off the deep end, or I'll drive myself crazy. I DO feel much, much better.

Maureen@IslandRoar said...

Oh, I hate to hear you sounding so down. I've never been able to work on myself physically till I accept myself, that I'm awesome as I am. And then work on it.
I'm terrible at advice. I just know you are an amazing person and please don't beat yourself up. Baby steps, right? xo

suzicate said...

Well, I'd just have two cookies and check in with blogland tomorrow!

injaynesworld said...

I spent most of my life as a carb junky. I had a high metabolism and could eat anything I wanted. Then one day I noticed that clothing manufactures were suddenly making my size much smaller and tighter than they used to. And there was this thing that had attached itself to my middle which was suspiciously reminiscent of a flotation device. WTF?! Since I am nothing if not vain and shallow, that was it. Out with everything containing carbs and in with lots of veggies and protein. I also started pilates which is amazing at chipping away at the middle. Anyway, it's two years later, I've gotten the weight off and kept it off. Now if I want a cookie or pizza or whatever once in a while I can have it with no problem. Stay positive. You can do it, too. Even if you're not as vain and shallow as I am. ;)

Oz Girl said...

I would be no help to you right now. I have gained at least 20 lbs *gasp* since I moved to KS almost 2 years ago. This is more than I have ever weighed in my life. I hate it, and yet I can't seem to stop the cookie celebration, same as you.

I admire injaynesworld, because she is vain and shallow. I wish I could be vain and shallow, but honestly, I just don't care anymore!!

What to do??!!

steppinthru said...

Well, looks like a lot of us are in this old sinking boat together. I'm certainly not one to advise you on any kind of diet since I now weigh about 30 lbs more than the last time I was 9 months pregnant. I'm going to try the low-fat, mostly vegetable & fruit & legume diet. You'll know I'm sticking with it when you see a 60 year old bloated, gassy old gal.

Midlife Jobhunter said...

Would seem you have taken the first step - writing about it. Know you are not alone. I think at this age, if we "maintain" we are doing well. Meanwhile, I don't seem to have any work tomorrow (taught sex ed to 7th graders today) so I'm going to the YMCA tomorrow. Only been there once in three weeks. Plan to lie in the water and hope to get more than few laps out of it. And the, I think I'll have a glass of wine. So it goes.

Don't be so hard on yourself, SMB. We're in a tough time of life. Be kind to yourself.

binks said...

I keep telling myself that I will eventually loose all the baby weight.

Maybe after 20 years I should stop calling it baby weight. *sigh*

Ain't it nice to know that you're not alone???

Wsprsweetly Of Cottages said...

Keep on waiting, pussycat, because the day will come when you don't give a damn anymore. No...t'is only too true...the day has finally come when I am happy wearing long shirts, dark jeans and slacks, and I eat most anything I want. Yes, I do watch it now and then...but otherwise...I've decided I don't want to die whimpering about my weight. I just people watch and feel much better about myself!
That's one of the "pro's" about getting old. :) You just don't give a damn!!
Hugs,
Mona