SPINNING AND SPIRALING DOWNWARD

I made it to spin this morning on time. I chose a bike near the back because the people in the front are just so intense. A few more people filtered in after me but the class was only about half full. This didn't really seem to be a problem until the class started. The problem was that there was no one in front of me which for all intents and purposes meant I was the front row. Uh oh! I'm new to this spinning thing. I don't need to have the instructor having a beeline view of my posture, huffing and puffing, lack of proper form and the extra breaks necessary to keep me from having a stroke. I kept praying that more people would come as the class progressed. Where were the Barbies? Where were the athletes?

I did the best I could but to be honest, my best was not so good today. Maybe it was the fact that I didn't get up early enough to have breakfast or even coffee. Maybe it's because morning is not really when I'm at my peak performance. I'm much more energized in the afternoon. Maybe it just wasn't my day. But whatever it was, spin kicked my butt today.

As usual, the room was dark and the disco ball was spinning. My shoes, headband and sportsbra were glowing from the black light. This made it easy for me to spot myself in the mirror and observe my lack of good posture. Robin, the instructor, played lame (in my opinion) 80s music today. Is there anyone (besides Robin, apparently) who likes this stuff! Oh, gosh, I'm starting to sound like an old woman!

Now, Robin is an amazing specimen of a woman and normally her energy and stamina is enough to motivate me to work myself into a spinning frenzy. Today… not so much. I worked hard though, believe me. Once again, we peddled ourselves silly all while punching, reaching, climbing, rowing and then peddling one leg at a time. But today, I found myself mocking Robin in my head. At one point, she said something about getting ready to jump. I'm thinking, "Jump! There's no jumping in spinning!" (said in my head like the line in A League of Their Own). And dang if she didn't hear me because we didn't ever do anything that resembled jumping. This scared me because now I'm thinking Robin has super powers and can hear what I'm thinking. And my thoughts were not all that kind. I was cranky, unmotivated and just plain rebellious. Another problem was that as I mentioned earlier, she could see me clearly. So while she may not have been talking directly to me, it sure seemed like it. She kept saying things like, "Pull your stomach in.", " Straighten your posture.", " Move, move, MOVE!" and "Faster, faster!"

So now, I'm worried that with her apparent super powers she can hear my mental replies to her commands. I'm thinking things like, "Listen, here, skinny b*tch!" and "I AM moving, are you blind!" and "Maybe if you didn't have this lala music to a crappy beat, I might be more inclined to pump it up a little more".

The class concluded, I thanked Robin for a great class (because I'm polite like that) and walked out feeling a bit defeated.

I think I'm PMSing.

And to add insult to injury, I walked into MHS's office upon my return home and he said, "Man, you don't look good." Thanks, JackASS.