Sunday, January 3, 2010

A LITTLE ‘SLICE’ OF CHRISTMAS

giant-thumb So, if you’ve been reading here over the last week, you know that I got a little crazy with my favorite knife on Christmas day which resulted a thumb injury.  I would link it but I’m lazy and it’s only a few posts back.  If you’re interested you’ll find it. 

I have since discovered what the ER doc was saying when he mentioned that “this may not take.”  The sutures didn’t do their job.  The wound is still open.  No, Janie, I’m not going to post pictures because it’s ugly and gross and I don’t like ugly and gross.  I only like the pretty pictures.

It doesn’t cause me a great deal of pain but it is most definitely a pain in the arse.  I have to keep a bandage on it.  My hands are always in water which means that the bandage is always falling off.  Frankly the whole ordeal has just pissed me off.  Looking on the brighter side, I can only hope that I will remember this inconvenience and be more careful in the future.  And at some point, I hope that this household will return to normal and won’t come to a complete stand-still every time I pick up a knife.

I’ve learned a few things over the past week while suffering the consequences of my thumb injury.  It hasn’t been all bad.  I’ve listed the pros and cons should you be considering slicing off a piece of your thumb for some reason:

Pros:

  1. In the beginning, I didn’t do any dishes.  There was beaucoup sympathy and willingness to help.  As time moved on, sympathy waned and I had to step in because things just don’t get done fast enough to suit me. (But I’m not a control freak)
  2. Same goes for help with housework.
  3. ……. and help with cooking.
  4. You can draw a face on your bandage and play sock puppets
  5. I did find that new best friend at the ER registration desk.  I heart you very much,  Ms. Registration Lady.
  6. Milking it gets me special privileges sometimes.
  7. I’ve convinced my family that ice cream promotes faster healing.
  8. I’ve learned to crack an egg one-handed like a pro.

Cons

  1. It hurts a bit when I bang it on something (and I seem to do this alot)
  2. Texting minus one thumb is difficult and awkward .
  3. Typing a blog post, comments, etc is difficult because the bandage gets in the way and pushes more than one key at a time.
  4. My family won’t give me a handicap in Wii Wii competitions . (maybe because I still kicked butt even though I was the “Thumbless Wonder”)
  5. I can’t remember to take the stupid antibiotics.  Every six hours is ridiculous!  Who can do that?  
  6. Wound dressings don’t come in holiday colors.  It would have been nice to bling up my bandage for New Years.
  7. I had to sit out for skeet shooting at the range.  *pout*
  8. I’m not sure what happens next but I’m pretty sure that it’s going to hurt and that is a little frightening.

So there you have it.  If you’re thinking of slicing off a piece of a digit for any reason, you now have the tools to make an educated decision.  I am nothing if not a public servant. 

Be careful out there.


Hugs,
SMB

28 comments:

midlife slices said...

When I glanced at the picture on here I thought.....dang, she needs to wash that thang. Ha!

I took HBL's stitches out and couldn't wait to do so because he took mine out from some past wound and every time I'd yelp and say he was hurting me, he's say...."oh stop being such a baby". Needless to say......I could tell he wanted to yelp too but he didn't. I loved it! LOL

only a movie said...

Ha ha, slice.

Not taking much to amuse me today.

I'm glad it's healing ok and sad that your family is not waiting on your every need while it heals...

Brian Miller said...

i may need to slice my thumb just to hav an excuse fr my poor wii performance...hope it heals well soon!

Pseudonymous High School Teacher said...

I cannot believe that your family won't give you a handicap for Wii.

Hope your handicap heals soon SMB ; -)

Wsprsweetly Of Cottages said...

Oh for pity sake, stop whining! If you lose your thumb you'll adapt! *smile*
So...do I get a hug? Huh? Do I?

Maureen@IslandRoar said...

What do you have to do to get some real sympathy? Slice off the whole hand? I'm having sinus surgery the end of the month, and hoping for AT LEASt a handicap on the Wii!1
Be careful of infection and feel better!

demainca said...

Tell you what my Mister did. He bought me a glove, one of the gloves you wear when you are slicing anything! I haven't cut myself in a very long time but he bought extra extra sharp knives.Don't know if I'll use it but maybe I'll think about it, cause I'll get no sympathy here!

otin said...

Okay, now I have read everything!

A post about the pros and cons of cutting your finger off! hahahaha!

Oh, you are too funny

Yea, if I cut my foot off I wont have to take the garbage out! :)

Kelly's Ideas said...

injuries of any kind are not fun - hope you have a full recovery.

Love to you.

Kelly
http://www.ivebecomemymother.com

blueviolet said...

I was thinking that the pros sounded pretty good until I read the cons. The cons unravel the pros big time.

I hope the next stage is not painful! I can see why it would be hard to heal. We use our hands ALL the time.

Fragrant Liar said...

Thumbthing about that photo disturbs me. Um, it's ugly. I'm hoping your thumb isn't quite so sinister looking and that you're pain-free real soon. Meantime, milk it, baby!

MilesPerHour said...

Thanks for the warnings!

Kimberly said...

No good deed goes unpunished!

injaynesworld said...

Okay, well... having weighed the pros and cons, I think I'll pass. That's a helluva thumb photo you found there, though. Who would build a monument to a thumb?

Beth said...

In the event I ever take a slice off a digit, I will keep this list handy! Thanks for your commitment to making this public service announcement.

Snappy Di said...

:-(( Sorry for the pain and the hassle this is causing you. That's quite the thumb in the photo btw. Where the heck is that??

Di

Heather said...

It never fails, hurt one finger or thumb and you will bump it a gillion times.

I hope it heals well.

Jan said...

I can NEVER remember to take antibiotics on schedule, and rarely finish the entire dosage like they say you should - it's a wonder I haven't died from some massive infection.

Red is a holiday color - didn't you bleed on the bandage enough? :D

Cristin said...

I lost a huge chunk of a finger on New Year's many moons ago.

Stitches coming out feels way grosser than going in.

Good luck.

Arkansas Patti said...

You know,someone probably got big money for that thumb in the picture. Gross.
So sorry about your fingie. Milk it all you can. Too funny on the pros and cons.
Sexy, bling bandaids seems like a good money making idea for 2010. Why not?? Patent that idea.

thistle said...

thank you from the bottom of my queasy little tummy for not posting the injury pics :) And, for the record, one of my co-workers had day surgery that involved a local anaesthetic also, and she said the same thing about that leetle needle...she thought he had started without the freezing. It's the worst part!!

JOE TODD said...

Orenthal James said he would help with knife training and he is the expert. Right now he is a volounter working with a government agency in LoveLock C.C. which is in Lovelock, Nevada. You would have to travel because his duties do not allow him the opportunity or liberty to travel at this time. For a small fee I am sure he would be willing to autograph your thumb. While you are there if you are up for a little football just as Orenthal James for a few pointers.

croneandbearit said...

I have done this same thing twice in my life. Ow both times. Once while we lived in Belgium I sliced my index finger very deeply but was in process of preparing a pan of apple brownies to send to the General's wife for her big party (which I had no intention of going to lol ). Imagine my surprise when I got ready to take the pan over to her house and realized my bandage was gone. She never asked me to prepare anything again. I have a sneaking suspicion someone got more than an apple brownie that day. And the General's wife never requested I bake for her again. True story.

Optimistic Pessimist said...

hmmm...well i really hate doing dishes, or any type of household work really, so may this would be a good option for me. Thanks for making a pros/cons list.

Tresa said...

I fell in my mom and dad's livingroom on Christmas (it's a wonder you didn't hear the boom all the way down south). First I laughed, then I started to cry--the best part was that the crying temporarily cleared my sinuses. I got a lot of sympathy; I ate it up!

Nishant said...

I'm glad it's healing ok and sad that your family is not waiting on your every need while it heals..

Work from home India

manker said...

nothing like ye ol "slice of life"... heal well

gp

Organic Meatbag said...

I bet the biggest con is that it hurts to imitate the Fonz's "AAAAAAYYYYYYYYYY!!!"