Sunday, August 9, 2009

SOMETHING ABOUT SMB

something_mary

I’m back from hiatus and want to thank you all for reading or re-reading my reruns. I was certain back then that the only people to read this blog would be my family and friends who were shamed into it. A year later, I’m by no means in the league of VodkaMom or Braja but am astounded by and grateful for the blogging buds I’ve met here in the interwebs. You guys are the BEST!



I think I may have mentioned after my physical that my physician, Dr. Black Cloud, ordered an ultrasound of my thyroid. What I didn’t mention is that I’m a knot-head. Yes, I have a knot on my head. A perfectly round slight protrusion from my forehead. (Certain family members are saying that my natural horns are beginning to show.) So Dr. BC figured since I was already having the ultrasound of the thyroid, she would just throw in my head as an extra study. Doctor’s appointments were just some of the things on my plate last week while I was on hiatus.

Last monday, I arrived on time wonders never cease for my ultrasound studies. The tech was friendly and since he recognized me as someone in the medical field, he put me at ease by chatting about his experiences in the OR with my employer. The thyroid ultrasound was without event and we moved quickly on to the knot on my head. The location of the knot made it difficult to get a good image and several gadgets were used to try to get a better picture. If you’ve ever had an ultrasound, you know that they use that slimy gel on the probe to facilitate ease of movement. I was very clear that he was not to mess up my hair or makeup. It took him a minute to realize that I was kidding.

Eventually he was satisfied that he had gotten clear images and the study concluded. He gave me a towel to wipe off the gel and led me out the door. There was no mirror in the room. I was sure that my hair was a mess. I did my best to smooth it down as best I could without a mirror. I thought I had done an OK job. I walked to the elevator where I rode with a father and his two young children. I walked thru a crowded lobby and out the door to my car. It was there that I saw my image reflected in my car window.

Remember that movie, “Something About Mary”? Poor Mary mistakes Ben Stiller’s character’s body fluid for hair gel and creates quite the “doo” for their date at the restaurant. Yeah, that was me. *sigh*



Hugs,
Smart Mouth Broad

41 comments:

only a movie said...

OH that's funny. Hope the results were all good stuff.
Now that you're back from hiatus, I feel compelled to blog about something, although I'm still feeling the slump. ::sigh::

otin said...

At least it was really gel! LOL! (It was, right?)hehehe

Duchess said...

Just tell everyone you're a trend setter.

Good luck with the tests!

Nikke said...

Haha.
I've done something like that before. I was mortified, but got a HUGE laugh at the expense of myself.
Hope all the doc stuff went well.

darsden said...

one of my favorite movies.. oh and you are in the league too :-)

Creepy said...

I've had far worse things in my hair...

Am on the edge of my seat, wanting to hear good results from ultrasound....

lisa said...

Your such a trendsetter.

blueviolet said...

LOL, that's hilarious! I'm anxious for you to get the all clear from the doctors though.

The Blue Ridge Gal said...

Hee hee... love that movie. So when will they know if it's just going to be one horn or twins?

Di
The Blue Ridge Gal

Michel said...

hahaha! HILARIOUS! You should go back and punch that guy. Eventually, he'll think it is funny.

Linda said...

Hey Girl! Hope al the results are good ones. Glad to have you back.

Jason, as himself said...

I'm so relieved it is just gel because that other stuff is really hard to wash out!

Ahem. One would imagine. Ahem.

Oz Girl said...

LMAO, and I'm sure the man in the elevator was too after you had gotten off!! Hoping the results are all NOTHING. Nothing there, nothing to worry about!!

Pastor Sharon said...

first off, I'm glad your Thyroid is okay! And I am just as grateful that the "gel" in your hair wasn't the same thing that was in Mary's hair. . . NASTY!

Maureen@IslandRoar said...

Just think of the wonderful bonding you provided for that dad and his kids when they talked about you the rest of the day.
Hope all is well with your tests.

Kelly's Ideas said...

very funny - kind of like the time I had toilet paper hanging down my skirt walking across a crowded restaurant.. the images just stay with you forever...lol
Love,
Kelly
http://www.ivebecomemymother.com

Pseudonymous High School Teacher said...

Hehehe... I can picture this perfectly without having the photo.

iananderson52 said...

I just saw that Something about Mary clip. Too funny. Well, there you go - reinventing yourself for all to see. Just have to ride with it, I guess.

Midlife Jobhunter said...

that last post was me not Ian. For some reason he was on and I didn't know. next post from me, not ian.

Gaston Studio said...

Also done something similar at the doctor's office, but not that funny!

Sending prayers that all will be well.

♥ Braja said...

We're all in the same league, my lovely....bet on it...
xoxoxo
Oh, and still laughing at Michel's comment...I agree. EVENTUALLY he'll get it....

ReRe said...

Still laughing! Thanks for the giggle this morning.

Hit 40 said...

Sounds like the ultrasound went well. They usually let it slip if they see anything askew. The technicians would not make great poker players.

You didn't mention a dye contrast. Shooting ya up with something fun always adds to the joy of an ultrasound. :-)

JOE TODD said...

I really reeally would have liked to have seen that

Reader Wil said...

Ha, ha... Shall I call you punky?
Anyway the lady in the photo is a good-looker!! Is that you? Very beautiful!

Jan said...

ROFL - I kind of thought that was coming.

When do you get the test results back?

dana said...

As long as the results came out fine, screw the "do"!

JOE TODD said...

I put a MckLinky for vacation posts on the sidebar of my blog. If you have a post you would like to link on my blog feel free. Thanks Joe Todd

Fragrant Liar said...

HAHAHAHA! I can just see this! ut if it hadn't happened, what would you have blogged about?

Fragrant Liar said...

Oh, and you didn't say. Results?

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

Oh THAT's FUNNY! :) But seriously - I'll be anxiously awaiting the results. ((HUGZ!))

smiles4u said...

LOL!!! And you didn't get a picture? Let us know when you get the results! Hugs, Lori

PS I sure have missed visiting your place here...love your new header!

Beth said...

BUT at least you knew your gel was not the other stuff. Ha, ha!

So when do you get results. I hope everything is just peachy.

Debbie said...

I am not too proud to say that I LOVE that movie! Good times.

Debbie said...

You had me in stitches right from the beginning with the "Dr. Black Cloud" thing! Gosh...I hope you are alright? Please let us know what the results are. My husband gets these soft tissue bumps in many places on his body. Most you cannot see but you can feel them...well..not YOU...but ME! Ahem! Anyway...I think they are called Wan's or Wen's or ?? Whatever they are, they are not hard. I guess probably yours might be hard if you are calling it a knot? Hope all comes out ok. Glad you are back. I didn't get to read too many reruns...sorry...been real busy. The ones I did read....classic SMB...you are a wonderful writer...and right from the start. Don't compare yourself to others...you are...after all...the one...the only...Smart Mouth Broad! There's no one else like you honey...and there never will be.:):)

Nap Warden said...

Oh no...that picture made me laugh. That gel is impossible to get out!

I came from Vodka Mom...I'll be taking your advice on the crazy bro situation;)

Tony Letts said...

OK I'll believe it was gel! Seems to me he got his own back sending you out like that after your SMB comment about not messing with your hair and make-up :)

Joanna Jenkins said...

But I'm sure you looked fabulous with the gel in your hair :-)

I'm just back from vacation too. I missed you!

xo

midlife slices said...

Would you believe i've never seen that movie?

Where's the picture of your new do?

You never told me the results. You know my memory. I forgot to ask again. grrr.....

Mrs. K said...

think about it this way- you made plenty people smile that day :)

nothingfancy1 said...

Just catching up on my reading. This is a good one!!! You know what I think? I bet that any young women who saw you - ran right to their stylist and said "I want what she has!" You've probably started a new trend.

That said, my hair always manages to look ridiculous after a dental appointment. They lean you waaaaay back in the chair and for some reason, I have bed head afterwards. Now with the invisalign, I have to go to the dentist more often and I guess I'm getting old, cuz I don't even bother to mush it down or try to get rid of the bed head...