All my life, I’ve lived my days through the lyrics of music. There’s not a crisis, celebration or everyday happening that I can’t find a song to sing to express my feelings. The line that keeps coming to mind these days is: “God is great. Beer is good. People are crazy.
Here are just some of the things I’ve recently heard from crazy people.
- I wish my brother was oddtistic. - out of the mouth of a 10 year old boy in the back seat of my car.
- I’m going to send my dog to boarding school. I sent my kids to boarding schools and look how well they’ve turned out. - from an acquaintance
- I’m sorry, she can’t come to the phone right now. She’s delivering a baby. Can you call back in a couple of hours? - into a cell phone on the elevator
- My t*tties hurt real bad and I think there’s something wrong with them. – a woman making a doctor’s appointment.
When you’re spinning round, things come undone. Welcome to Earth, 3rd rock from the sun.
What crazy things have you heard lately?
22 comments:
LOL @ the woman making a doctor's appointment!! Hilarious. How's this for crazy:
"These days, you gotta be real observative!" A detective speaking to a group at a Children's Protective Services training course.
Sadly, if you follow the health care debate, you're hearing crazy talk.
Nothing sounds too crazy when you are surrounded by nuts! You end up sounding like the crazy one!
Um. Scheduling one's physical therapy appt around your favorite TV show every weekday morning. I think that's crazy, but maybe I'm in the minority on this one.
BTW, love that first song ... Billy Currington. One of my favorite country singers. My son even likes that song, because the words speak to him, not that he likes country music... because people ARE crazy.
I heard (read) a grown woman who wanted permission to have ice cream for dessert after lunch... I told her it was okay because I had had ice cream for breakfast.. LOL Wellll, I did.
Snappy Di
Wow! I just hear crazy shit about why the homework is not done. Your crazy is much... crazier!!!
I work with Dementia patients...
It's eight hours of non stop crazy talk.. I can't pick one thing out of the bunch...
Working as a nurse, I hear crazy 12 hours a day. I too can't pick just one.
However, I love that song. . . "God is great, beer is good, and people are cray". Now I will have that in my head for the rest of my 12 hour shift!
Maybe I will start singing it to the lady who is on her call light every 15 minutes just to tell me there is a storm outside...
"Are you trying to push my buttons? A FIVE year old to his mother-- in line at the supermarket.
I almost fell on the floor laughing.
xo
Had to share this with you since my comment above. Answered this person's call light, the totally alert and oriented person, simply wanted to tell me. . .
"just wanted to tell you I will need to pee in a little while."
I asked,"are you sure you don't need to go now?"
"No, but I will in a little bit."
*Sigh*
I work with teenagers. They're in the same category as Creepy's hospice patients with saying crazy stuff.
The only things I hear that are crazy are those coming from my own mouth. I need some outside exposure!
That song cracks me up!
People are crazy!
There was a lady in my dad's church who raised her hand half way through the sermon and said, "Pastor, can we pray for Henry (her son), he has a dime in his nose!"
Can you believe that? I was thinking, "shouldn't you have been keeping an eye on little Henry? What the heck is prayer gonna do? go get it out and make him behave next time!
Girl, I hear crazy things every day. Yesterday, a kindergartener told me she liked to cook banana sandwiches. When I asked her if they were good, she said, "I don't know. I'm not eating that stuff."
My T*tt*es hurt? Who calls them that? Who says that to the dr's office? What in the world? LOL LOL LOL
Then again...overheard Nancy saying to coworker Bill in reference to Nancy's 12 year old daughter Katie and his wife Susan: "Katie hasn't started yet and her boobies are just small little bumps. Susan was like that too."
What 45 year old man talks to his male coworker about his daughter's period and "boobies" and what 45 year old man calls them boobies?
I refuse to comment about the crazy things I hear because they're all coming out of my mouth.
One person's crazy is another person's normal. The craziest thing I've heard in the past week is....."I'm going to lose 20 lbs before the first of the year"...and yes, I'm the one who said it.
I'm like Gaston Studio - most of the crazy things I hear come out of my crazy ass mouth.
I'm here because I'm not all there. News update: Man in Lancaster Ohio tasered catches on fire
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2009/08/19/national/main5251739.shtml
The craziest thing I have heard this week was a man speaking at a conference on addiction. The topic of discussion was "hitting a bottom" and he said "I hit my bottom but my bottom had a trap door!" I thought that was hilarious!
Me, this morning as I dropped The Young One off for Freshman Orientation at the high school:
"Son, please stop drooling on yourself."
One recent one was 'Grandad, why is your head growing out of your hair?
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