Thursday, January 29, 2009


A few days ago, I posted my 100th blog post. I announced at the time that my friend, Nothing Fancy was working on her 100th also. Well, Fancy (I can call her that because we are friends, ya know.) used her 100th post to tell how she met her husband and their love story. It is a romantic, ooey-gooey tale of almost and near misses that will just make your little heart go pitter pat. If you haven't read it, go there. Especially you Northerners… could use the extra heat. *wink*

Fancy's story inspired me to tell my own true love story. Now bear in mind that I met My Harley Stud when I was a wee bit younger so my story doesn't quite have the steam that Fancy's does but maybe….just maybe, it will make you say……………"Geesh, them thare country folk sure start 'em young."

Once a year when I was in elementary school, my mother would meet with my current teacher for a parent-teacher conference. Each year she was told the same thing.

  • She pays attention in class.
  • She follows instruction.
  • She is helpful.
  • She gets good grades.


  • She talks too much….
  • And she's boy crazy.

Every.Single.Year. What can I say? At least I'm consistent.

The year I entered the fifth grade was the first year that the sixth graders moved to the middle school. Suddenly the fifth graders were the top dogs. My twin girlfriends, the Purdy Girls, and I were selected to be safety patrols. We were giddy with POWER.

We trained for our posts during the first week of school. Each day while we were training, there was a boy……a sixth grader…..who would walk over from the middle school to collect his younger siblings and walk them home. He was HOT. Seriously. OK, maybe not so seriously. But he was twelve year old HOT.

When it came time to pick our posts, the Purdy Girls (who were apparently just as boy crazy as I was) and I fought over who would get the corner where the HOT boy had to walk past everyday. I think we drew straws or flipped a coin. I can't remember. It doesn't matter because……I.WAS.THE.WINNER!

This hot, older "man" was a new kid. I was aware that his family moved to town. It's a very small town and if you know anything about small towns, you know that not much flies under the radar. Everybody knows everything. Plus one of his brothers was in the fifth grade. Kids notice the new kid. And in a small town, we embrace them. Anyway……….the HOT sixth grader would walk past my post everyday on his way to the school to pick up his four younger siblings. They would walk back past my post in stair-step formation. Now before you get the idea that they were some kind of modern day American Von Trapps, let me tell you this. MHS is the oldest of six children. Five boys, one girl. The youngest was not yet in school. Each day as they walked past, there was usually some swearing heard, the boys might pull the girl's hair. Sticks were thrown. They weren't singing "My favorite things" if you know what I mean.

Nevertheless, this foul-mouthed older "man" intrigued me. He didn't pay any attention to me. I was a fifth-grader after all. As if!

But all year, every day I would watch him walk past me twice. I would stare at him all glassy eyed, dreaming of the day we would have a mortgage and car payments and……..WAIT! That was NOT the fantasy. The reality was he never even said hello. He would just pass by and smile. The most amazing smile. Blue eyes and great teeth. The first time my mother met him (a few years later) she said, "Marry him, Smart Mouth. He has great teeth. Your children will have great teeth." She was kidding. I wasn't.

Things didn't heat up for another two years but that story will have to be another day.

OK, so it wasn't a steamy and edge-of-your-seat kind of story. But it was kinda cute, right? What is your true love story?


I just read this post to MHS who confirmed that he has no recollection of that silly safety patrol who was all ga-ga over him.


Anonymous said...

Okay...this is the sweetest thing I've ever read! You have really been in love with MHS since 5th grade? just doesnt get any better than that! How very romantic!

Thanks for sharing your story...and I look forward to the next installment!

And thank you for the linky love and the kind words, my friend! more thing...You get the letter "B". Have fun!

Anonymous said...

Sweet story, but I did not meet my true love until I was 43. And he had great teeth too!

The Blue Ridge Gal

Anonymous said...

Wow, I cannot believe you said nice teeth. That is one of the first things I look at in a guy.

I knew I liked you :)

Anonymous said...

Awwww - this is sweet!

I can't tell how I met my true love; his kids don't know and it would scar them for life if they did.

Tricia said...

This is an adorably sweet story. Knowing someone for so long and being able to share that kind of history must be a treasure.

YankeeChick said...

What a cute story! So funny that he doesn't remember. {damn men, anyhow! lol}

Smart Mouth Broad said...

Fancy-I wouldn't say that I've been in love with him since then but I definitely had a crush. This didn't stop me from having other boyfriends though. LOL But I always kept my eye on MHS.

Thanks for the B. I'll work on it.

BRG-Sometimes it takes a little longer.

Lisa-Just like looking at a horse. LOL

Jan-Oh come on! Now you have to tell. Can you email me? Inquiring minds and all.

Tricia-At least this way, we definitely know each other's baggage. Not that you have too much when you get married at 12. LOL

YC-Yes, clearly I didn't make the same impression on him.

Anonymous said...

You can't just drop the story there. That's so unfair. I was getting caught up in your girlish games of flirtation.

Anonymous said...

What Jan said ... with knobs on ...

Joan said...

Hey.... Smart Mouth Broad! You didn't finish your story. I no likey that.

Reader Wil said...

This is an intriguing love story! I can't wait for the next instalment.

Wsprsweetly Of Cottages said...

Well, I mean, how steamy can it get between a 5th and 6th grader?!
(Never mind that!) I thought it was adorable. You had true basic attraction. The best kind! When a guy is "cute" to you..he is just plain cute to you. Period. 5th grader or not. Whether he admits it or not...he SAW you! I would bet my bottom dollar on that! I don't know...I don't think we paid all that much attention to teeth at that age. was serious basic attraction. It happens. It does.

cheatymoon said...

Such a sweet story. Thank you for sharing. Really cute.

(are you posting more?)

Anonymous said...

Ok that was good, and I don't usually like the mushy crap.

Can we hear the rest of the story now?

And did you kids have great teeth too?

VT Mom said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
VT Mom said...

Uh Oh, my fifth grade daughter better not be falling for the older man!! Even if he does have straight teeth (lord knows we could use some straightening in our gene pool!!)

Smart Mouth Broad said...

BV-I'll get around to it one of these days.

Tessa- Uh...OK. I have no idea what that means.

Joan-Coming attractions.

RW-Stay tuned. I'm not sure when but there's a bit more to tell.

Mona-Oh he saw me alright but it didn't make any lasting impression.

Movie-Thanks. One day soon.

Smart Mouth Broad said...

WW-D1 had great teeth but was hit by a baseball right in the teeth as a young girl and needed dental work. D2 had to have braces. So much for my mother's prediction....*sigh*. They both have beautiful teeth now.

VTM-Better put her on a short leash. Those good-lookin' sixth graders are quite the attraction. LOL

Debbie said...

Are you kidding me? How cute are you two? That is the best love story yet.

Anonymous said... little boy crazy...always talking.....former firth grader, you. How cute is that story and as they always say.......the rest is history. :) Thanks for sharing and giving me something to say "awwwwwww" about. :)

JeanMac said...


Lori said...

Now this is sweet...tell us more!

Smart Mouth Broad said...

Debbie-Would I kid you?

MLS-Oh yeah, we're adorable! *cough*
And I still talk too much and love the boys/men.


Smiles-It's going to take me a few days to remember the details. Midlife forgetfulness, you know.

Anonymous said...

Safety patrol...i remember the days when they would trust us 'older' kids with such responsibilities...but this story?...adorable! I can just picture the NotTheVanTrapps family going by...can't wait to hear the next installment!

Smart Mouth Broad said...

Thistle-A child safety patrol would never work in South Florida. People would just run over them. But in small town, Indiana, the speed limit was 20 and 15 in the school zone. We had those long flags to put across the road.
And they were most definitely NOT the Von Trapps. MHS had a healthy curse word vocab at an early age.

Pseudo said...

Really sweet story. I cannot wait for part two.

binks said...

So cute, makes me think of my 5th grade crush. Never saw him after the 5th grade, he went to a different middle school.
I so like the idea for sharing on your 100th instead of that 100 list.

rachaelgking said...

That is seriously the cutest story I have ever heard! And there weren't even puppies and kittens in it!

This isn't nearly as cute... but it is the night I met B: