Tuesday, January 6, 2009


A little message to The Saint

Everyone is gone. It's weird to have an empty nest again. Oh, wait! I almost forgot that goofy looking handsome gentleman staying at the other end of the house in our guest room known affectionately on this blog as The Biker Nazi.

After more than a month of chaos, I didn't even leave my house the whole day on Saturday. I spent the entire day cleaning and resting, cleaning and resting. In fact, I didn't even get out of my jammies until about 4pm.

On Sunday, I was itching to get out and do something again. I suggested a bike ride might be in order and My Harley Stud and The Biker Nazi were more than happy to oblige. We set off for the historic district in Stuart. We had lunch at a locally owned sports bar (during the Dolpins game) and opted for the outside seating. It was a beautiful day. The food was great but the service was well….not so much. If you remember my earlier posts from our trip to Indiana, you know that poor service seems to follow The Biker Nazi. Or maybe it's just when he is with me. Anyway, it seems our very young server had a little too much party and too little sleep the night before. She had no problem in telling us this little tidbit though it became pretty clear as the lunch progressed. I may be showing my age here but my tolerance for poor customer service is at an all time low. Call in sick for Pete's sake. But if you're going to go to the trouble to show up, at least SHOW UP. And this concludes my anger management session for this post. (I just needed to get that off my chest.) MHS and BN weren't nearly as aggravated by the lack of service as I was.

After lunch, we decided to take a stroll through the shops in the historic district. I stopped to look at these in the window: (Psst! They are hand-made.)

Imagine my surprise to look up and see this in the window:
I realize the glare is pretty bad but you are seeing just what I saw: A Biker Nazi mannequin

BN kept disappearing into these cool little shops. Now if the man would have done more of this on our trip out West, my arse would have been a lot happier with him. We saw a welcome mat in this store that read: I like your underpants. (Get it?) Well, I thought it was funny.

That's an old theatre on the right that is still in business. The Three Rednecks were performing that day. We heard great things about them but didn't check it out.

We eventually made our way to the waterfront and a jazz festival which we found out is held the first Sunday of every month. I know where we'll be the first Sunday in February.

The music was great and the setting was perfect. Who knew the Biker Nazi likes jazz!
We're from Indiana. Now Hoosiers are known for their hospitality. MHS and I have just grown accustomed to the stand-offishness of the South Floridians. But the Biker Nazi knows no strangers. He considers it his personal obligation to see if he can make these cool cucumbers speak to him. On this particular outing, MHS and BN were attracting all the "older" women.

Here's the conversation I overheard while taking this picture:

BN-Cool! I just saw a stingray!

Older woman #1 - A stingray, really? Where?

Older woman #2 - Show us!

BN-Oh, sorry, he went under the dock. Stick your toe in the water. That'll make him come out.

MHS-smiles and remains completely silent.

OW#1-I'm not sticking my toe in that water. You stick your toe in the water.

BN-I can't. I don't have any toes. I lost them in a stingray accident.


Reader Wil said...

Wonderful post with that funny conversation in the end! Nice to go on a ride with you in your World!
Oh and the name of the dog is Milo. He teases my daughter's other dogs. He plays with them and then disappears into the house, waiting for the others to come in but they are not allowed to. Then he goes out and the game starts all over.

Lynn - the piggy bank painter said...

Great post. I thoroughly enjoyed it and now wish I lived further south with nice warm weather *sigh*

Jan said...

It looks so...warm there.

*sobs quietly*

Anonymous said...

Great post! Love the funny stuff by BN...

Midlife Slices said...

LOL I think I'd like the BN. I'm so jealous. You get to do all the good stuff. *sticks out bottom lip and pouts*

Vodka Mom said...

I want the damn welcome mat!!!

smiles4u said...

What a wonderful day! Looks and sounds like a day that I would love to have. I am sitting here in my snow and cold and feeling very jealous right now. And I want one of those welcome mats!

Pseudonymous High School Teacher said...

Great post, I love when you share Florida with us. This little town looks amazing. It reminds me of St Augustine. My sister and her family took us there when we visited them.

BTW I have no tolerance for poor service too. I put myslef through college waitressing, back in the day where you had to earn you way to an upscale restaurant. Now, when we go out and I get poor service it makes me pissy.

goodfather said...

The welcome mat is pure awesome.

Great line about the stingray accident! LOL!

Midlife Mama said...

**sigh** My ex-b/f had a Harley and we had some fun rides. I so miss Harley rides. I miss riding the b/f too, but that's a different thing. *wink*

thyme said...

LOL @ the stingray accident :-D

The blog is a little slow, I can't see the pictures :-( I will have to come back :-)

thistle said...

This is a beautiful area and now as i sit here in melting snow and flooding ditches...i am quite jealous indeed. BN sounds like my BIL, he talks to everyone too...and is especially adept at bringing out the mischief side of small children...

Smart Mouth Broad said...

RW-You should come with us sometime. (in all your world traveling, you could make a Florida stop) Milo is very cute. He sounds a lot like Pixie who thinks she is a big dog.

Lynn-Thanks. Don't hate me for my warm weather.

Jan-But you've got great chili to keep your warm. *wink*

BRG-BN's not too happy with me right now. LOL

MLS-Don't pout. Just come down and join us. You would like BN. He's a lot of fun when he's not a Pain in the.... LOL Just ask the Saint.

VodkaMom-Now wouldn't that be great in the entry to your classroom!

Smiles-We did have a fun day and that mat seems to have made a big hit in the blogosphere.

Pseudo-I love being near the water and Stuart is a great town. I love St. Augustine too.

So, I'm in good company with my p*ssiness. LOL

GF-The BN thinks pretty quick on his feet. BTW, he really did see a stingray but it really did go under the dock.

Mama-I think that SL has your hormones raging. LOL

Thyme-He's a funny guy. Sorry about the slowness. I keep hearing about problems but knock wood I haven't had any lately.

Thistle-Ewww, so it's melting now. Oh no.

The BN does talk to EVERYONE! And he can bring out the BEAST in Mayzie. They are great pals.

Geri said...

Wow, the biker Nazi would throw any shopper for a loop! Great post and looks like a good time.

thyme said...

I came back and I can see the pictures now! Love the sandals :-)

Smart Mouth Broad said...

Geri-Funny thing....I was actually reading your comment on my last post when I looked up and saw the sandals and then the BN.

Thyme. They are awesome sandals. They will customize them too. Handmade leather. Can you tell I love shoes!