Sunday, May 3, 2009


everything bagelLazy Sunday mornings. I love ‘em. I’ve told you several times about how I’m exercising, watching what I eat and trying to lose weight to look fabulous at my upcoming class reunion because I want to be the healthiest SMB I can be. I lost 3 lbs this week. Yay! To celebrate, I had a bagel. That might not sound like much of a celebration to you not to mention it’s a great way to gain back the lost lbs but for me, it’s a little slice of heaven with a schmear. It’s not just the bagel and the cream cheese but the process that gives me such a sense of happiness and contentment. It goes something like this.

I awaken to a sunny day with the man I love still snoring like a freight train at my side. I am immediately conscious of the fact that our nest is no longer empty as Daughter #2 is home from college for the summer. I remember that D2 mentioned there are no good bagel places in her college town. My Harley Stud opens his eyes and I say, “ Maybe I should ride the Harley into town for bagels.” He smiles. This of course is my subtle way of suggesting that he should ride into town for bagels as I don’t really ride the Harley.

Before long MHS is distracted by a technical difficulty with the television in the bedroom and I realize that my subtle suggestion might have been too subtle. If I want bagels, I’m going to have to go get them myself as he is now swearing like a drunken sailor at the satellite receiver totally consumed with the task at hand.

I rise, stretch and go through the necessities which include making a pot of Sunday coffee aka Paula Deen’s Savannah Seduction. With thermos in hand, I grab my sunglasses, visor and hairclip and I’m out the door. I put the top down on my convertible (my version of a Harley) and tune into a favorite CD. Along the way, I pass joggers, horseback riders, bikers and dog walkers. I am aware that I’m a lucky girl just to experience this glorious day.

I sing as I go and this makes me really happy. Passersby………..not so much. I am blasting the Eagles, Lynard Skynard and the Dixie Chicks.

I arrive at my destination and dance and twirl my way into the bagel shop (OK, that’s a lie but the thought did cross my mind) and am once again pleased as punch to find that they still observe the old-fashioned baker’s dozen rule. I am only slightly annoyed when the young girl behind the counter feels it necessary to explain to me that two 1/2 lbs of cream cheese are really 1 lb.


Was it the blonde hair or that new wrinkle in my brow that makes me look like a confused boxer that made her feel like she had to explain?

I arrived home to find all the electronics in working order, world peace restored and the smiling faces of my family (minus my darling Daughter #1 who is partying in Charlotte.)God’s in His heaven and all’s right with the world. (today)



I “borrowed” the pictures in this post from the internet. The bagel picture at the top is from Ess-a-Bagel in Manhattan. I’ve been to Ess-a-Bagel and here’s a little Smart Mouth tip should you be fortunate enough to go there.

Don’t ask for your bagel to be toasted. After they look at you like you have two heads, they will (rather rudely) inform you that their bagels are warm and fresh from the oven and do not require toasting. Oh and it is my considered opinion that bagels just taste better when served by a surly New Yorker behind the counter. Our local Brooklyn-based bagel shop recently changed hands. The new people lack the “tude” and it completely changes the experience. But I still can’t resist an everything bagel toasted with a schmear of cream cheese. *sigh*


Michel said...

I was all set to make a jealous comment about your yummy bagel and (non-pre-frozen cream cheese) when i saw that picture of the boxer.



Michel said...

PS you are very lucky!!

Beth Niquette said...

Though I am from Oregon, I adore New York. I've had a love affair and deep connection with New York and her wonderful people for years. We've been across the nation twice to visit.

I get homesick when I've been away too long--and your description of the surly New Yorker bagel seller made me long for that city again.

(sigh) OOoooh, how lovely.

Have a wonderful, lazy, bagel munching Sunday morning!

Anonymous said...

nothing but einstein's around here...but sounds like a great morning...believe it or not i'm trying to get to like coffee. it's not working.

Smart Mouth Broad said...

Michel-Isn't he just the cutest little thing!
And yes, I know. I have to keep telling myself that now that hurricane season is almost here.

BethN-I've only been to NY once but I loved it. I can't wait to go back.

Mrs K-Are you sure? Some of my favorite rude bagel places are in your neck of the woods. I lived down that way for 17 years before moving here.

Smart Mouth Broad said...

Oh and Mrs. K - The coffee. For me it's all about the creamer. So many flavors. Lots of creamer and you'll become a coffee drinker in no time. You're probabaly better off for not liking it tho.

Pseudonymous High School Teacher said...

Your day sounds lovely and I felt like I was right there with you. Loved the "passersby....not s much." Everythign bagel with a smear is my favotrite too. Now I'm hungry.

Anonymous said...

Sounds like a great start to a most lovely day. It's been rainy and dreary the entire time my Son has been visiting so besides doing a little shopping, we've mostly been lazy. I'm READY for the sun to shine and I'm sure it will the second they leave for home. Ugh....such is life.

only a movie said...

Love this post, SMB. I grew up in the greater metropolitan NY area and appreciate a damn good bagel. A little piece of heaven. Salt bagel, no toasting necessary, and lots of cream cheese. Yum.

I love how you described your morning! :-D

Gaston Studio said...

Sounded like a fabulous day until... you went to the bagel place and I started getting images of the Soup Nazi in one of Seinfeld's episodes! You remember that one, too funny!

Glad you had a fab Sunday!

Wsprsweetly Of Cottages said...

Nothing, I repeat nothing, I read leaves me with such a sense of "all's right with the world" and things are as they should be, then when I read a post from Smart Mouth Broad.! I can't explain it nor am I going to try. It just IS! :)

Seinfeld! when I watched Seinfeld...sorta.. :)'cept you are real life!

Phat Mama said...

Mmm, I love a bagle and cream cheese.

With a little bit of smoked turkey.

And swiss cheese.

And a machiatto.

And sun chips.

I just gained 10.

Blasé said...

My wife has lost 4 pds in ten days.

Your husband may want to try the 'Suad Appliance' for his snoring.

Boxers are my favorite dog...and I like the pic you chose of it, and the size of it. I wish I knew how to make my pics very large.

We have met Paula Dean at a book signing. The air-brush pics of her does wonders for her. There is wishful thinking...and then there is reality.

When I want to exercise my jaw muscles...I eat bagels.

smiles4u said...

Sounds like the perfect way to start the day!

Fragrant Liar said...

Oh, that does sound like a great start to the day. In Florida yet. And that boxer, what a cutie. We love boxers in this family. :)

Debbie said...

Oh Smart Mouth I wished you lived closer by. You are definitely a girl I could hang out with. I'm not sure if I knew you in a past life or you remind me of someone or ?? but I love reading anything you write. Your cute and funny as hell and all the time keeping it real. I love that. Yup...the good old everything bagel with cream cheese days....oh I remember them so well. That is my absolute favorite bagel and always has been but don't go anywhere in public after eating one without a toothpick...all those seeds tend to get stuck. Why that little twit explaining to you about 2 half pounds being one! How dare she! have a convertible?? I AM jealous! You ARE a lucky girl. I know about those days when the world feels absolutely perfect....nothing could be better...they don't happen that often but they are like a drug, it's a natural high though. Like my friend says though...if you are having a bad day...this shall pass...if you're having a good day...this shall pass too! Darn!

Beth said...

I LOVE bagels. With cream cheese. And a little lox.

We don't have a bagel shop in my town. Go figure. The hicks haven't discovered how good bagels are yet.

And I do love the look on the boxer's face. He is so cute!

Glad you had a great Sunday morning.

Beth said...

Oh, and I've met Paula Deen. Actually, her son Jamie is a good friend of ours. Jamie used to work for my husband when he was in college. A couple of years ago, we got to be on Paula's Party and it was FUN!

Maybe I need to get you a signed cookbook. :)

Pearl said...

Your diet is going very well!


Anonymous said...

Bagels and cream cheese almost replaces chocolate on my favorites list. I love an everything bagel with schmear! If faced with the above mentioned bagel or the most decadent chocolate pastry I would be hard pressed to choose. Knowing me, I'd probably get both, can't go making those tough decisions on an empty stomach and as for the calories, well, diet? We don't need no stinking diet!

Auntie, aka Dog Girl said...

Keep up the good work with the dieting! That EVERYTHING bagel is a yummy way to reward yourself.
Now my stomach is growling.

Anonymous said...

Love the wrinkled foreheads that Boxers offer up.... Rotties do the same thing. Cute and I hope your bagels were delicious!

The Blue Ridge Gal

Smart Mouth Broad said...

Pseudo-The fact that I can't sing shouldn't stop me, right?

MLS-Bummer that they had bad weather for their vacation. Sounds like you got to relax a bit tho.

Movie-That's what I love about the ET bagels from this place....the salt. Not every ET bagel has salt.


Mona-You are so sweet. Seinfeld? No where near but I do have a blog about nothing. Isn't that what his show was supposed to be?

PMama-Now you're making me hungry.

Blase-Snaps for your wife! I left a comment about the pics. Thanks.

Smiles-It was the best Sunday I've had in a long time.

Liar-I just love the little smush faces. Mayzie is a boxer mix.

Debbie-Alas, Maine is a long way away. LOL to the toothpick. You've got that right.

Beth-I'm jealous. We went to the Lady and Sons for dinner last November and I had our picture taken with her cardboard cutout. Does that count? :-) I would love to be on Paula's party except I would probably make a fool of myself. LOL

Pearl-Thanks. Hopefully I can keep it up long enough to make a real difference.

Delaney-Hmm? That would be real toss-up for me too. Is there beer with that chocolate pastry?

Auntie-If I lived where you live, I would be eating bagels way too often.

Di-Mayzie does it too as she is a boxer mix but she won't do it on queue for my camera, darn it!

Pseudonymous High School Teacher said...

SMB - It totally should not stop you. Doens't stop me ; -)

If Beth gets tickets to Paula's Party I'm inviting myself along.

Anonymous said... I am longing for a bagel and a lazy Sunday. Sounds simply wonderful! have a convertible? Life just isn't fair. Not that I want one, mind would muss up my hair, right? Yeah...that's it!

Lo said...

great.... now i'm starving. and now i must have a bagel. sigh. nothin' beats a bagel.

Tricia said...

Now this does sound like a wonderful Sunday, and I love what's playing on your car stereo.

Congratulations on the weight loss!!!

Midlife Jobhunter said...

Three pounds! That has to feel good. Almost as good the bagel, I'm sure. Why, oh, why does it all have to come down to what we eat?

Keep going.